secret fantasy

i have a secret fantasy where i pack up everything of value to me, sell the rest (or give it away), and hit the open road in search of truth, beauty, and peace. i'm not sure if this is a subconscious desire to run away from reality or if it is just my idealism coming through. the fact that i believe that truth, beauty and peace could be found through such an abandonment of responsibilty says a lot about why i often feel that i have failed to reach my full potential. you may note that a lot of artists, writers and musicians have felt that they found (or could find) a better life by chucking it all and starting over somewhere new. but it would also be worth mentioning that many of these individuals were either alcoholics, suffering from chronic mental illness, or both. what does that say about me? could be chronic unhappiness, could be peter-pan syndrome, or....ironically, i could just be normal.